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Ad Messages We All Never Wanted

Ryan Chute
Ryan Chute
October 24, 2022
Ad Messages We All Never Wanted

Ad messages come in all shapes and sizes. Some are decent ads that resonate with an audience in a way that isn’t forceful or plain weird. They’re suitable and aligned with the market. However, other ads are different. Some should never have seen the light of day or the glow of the market. They are bad advertisements, whether the creators realize it or not.

I think you know the ad messages I’m talking about, too.

The ads are framed as creative advertising but are little more than weak attempts to grasp an audience’s attention. These ad messages leave a bad or bizarre impression after vanishing from your line of sight.

They’re lousy, and they should have never, never, never met the stamp of approval.

If you’re in business advertising and a few of those old advertisements roll out against your will, stick around. We’ll discuss the worst types of ad messages around today. That way, you can avoid letting them slip past you in the future. With any luck, we’ll slowly convince everyone to do away with these messages in advertising.

First, we have to discuss why these ad messages are so bad.

Ethics in Ads

Ethics in Ads

What is the purpose of advertising? You could say that advertising has many different purposes. You can use advertising to educate your audience, persuade them to take action, or remind them of your value. Really, though, the purpose of advertising is to draw attention to your brand.

That’s why so many businesses value it.

Advertising is an essential weapon. But, as brands wield advertising to fight against their competitors, many feel the sheath of ethics weighing them down. And to gain the upper hand, they may toss ethics off to the side and start making false claims to their audience.

That’s when we start to notice the worst ad messages pop up.

With the ethical lines brushed away by competition, brands will use harmful advertising as long as it generates the most impressions. They want to be attention-grabbing and memorable, even if it’s a bad memory. From the head honcho board room standpoint, it may be fine. However, on the ground floor, a blind man could spot the harmful effects of unethical advertising.

With false claims piling up, audiences will lose faith and interest in a brand. Conversely, ethical advertising allows your brand to connect with people on a real level without stepping over a line.

You don’t have to make alarming or false claims.

Simply avoid misrepresentation and adhere to social norms. Your audience will see you as a trustworthy business, and that will take you further without upsetting anyone. Check out this great article from Forrester about the benefits of ethical marketing.

Never Say These Things in Your Ad Messages

If you retain nothing else, retain this list of 10 things you should never say in your ad messages. If any of these things appear in your advertising, you’ll have nothing but distrust between you and your audience. Ensure you don’t miss anything. You can grab a pencil and paper if that’s what it takes.

As we go through the list, try to remember advertisements with these things. If that fails, just turn on the TV and wait. You’ll more than likely come across an advertisement that is dooming its business right in front of you.

Promises

Do not promise everything you’ll deliver. It doesn’t matter if you’re 100 percent sure that you can deliver everything. Don’t promise. Always intentionally leave something out. That extra thing will become the wow factor of your offer. The consumer will think, “Wow, that’s so nice of them! I can’t believe they gave me this bonus.” Meanwhile, you planned to deliver it all along.

What should you leave out of your ad?

It’s up to you. However, be mindful when selecting what to leave out of your ad message. You don’t want it to be the biggest part of your offer. Choose something that says, “We care about you.”

Sentences with the word “Imagine…”

Sentences with the word “Imagine…”

If you want to take your audience on a riveting adventure of imagination and storytelling, that’s awesome. But do not start your sentence with “Imagine…” That immediately informs the reader what is about to happen. No matter how you spin or mangle words from that point on, there’s no surprise on the horizon.

Instead, drop your audience into the deep end right away. “Falling from a helicopter, you crash into the deep blue ocean and must…” “*BOOM* There’s a massive ripple through the air. You turn around to see an alien spaceship… ”

You get the point. Be exciting and original. Everyone has seen “Imagine…” a thousand and one times. You need something different to stand out. Leave that word at home and think of something really captivating.

Your name

Don’t use your name in an ad more often than you would in a normal conversation. It’s tempting to cram your name in your ad messages as often as possible, but that’s nothing but [AdSpeak](https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/adspeak#:~:text=Definition of adspeak,wrong with politics and government.—).

Marketers used that method way back in the day because the average person saw only a few ads daily. They had to bulldoze their brand name in their audience’s mind. But if you try that now, ads will seem like they stepped out of a time machine fresh from the 1940s. Keep things natural.

Unpleasant mental image

Fear-based marketing is powerful, but it often backfires. You can easily capture someone’s attention with it. However, that person will associate your brand with that unpleasant mental image you gave them. If that happens, they’ll likely avoid your brand going forward and it will be a hard fight to change that first impression.

Challenges from smaller competitors

It’s tempting to cast a light on your smaller competitors to explain how your brand and business are better. However, that will work against you and elevate the audience’s perception of your competitors. They have to think there’s a reason you mentioned them. On the flip side, if your larger competitors mention you, embrace it and get ready for a lot of attention.

Exceptional service

Go ahead. Brag about your exceptional service until the sun sets. Most people will never believe you. And those who believe your claim will demand unrealistic service from you 24/7, no matter what. Either way, you lose. Instead, use your ads to highlight objective truths about your service.

The recession

It’s tempting to connect with your audience and sympathize with their situation by mentioning the recession (or inflation). Unfortunately, that will remind your audience that it’s a terrible time to spend money. It won’t really matter how badly they want your thing.

Unsubstantiated claims with no evidence

Your audience wants cold, hard facts and undeniable proof that your service or product will function as intended. Anything else is just white noise. People hear enough bold claims and outright lies in their day-to-day lives. Don’t force them to hear more of those from you.

“If you can’t prove it, or everyone else would quickly say, ‘me too!’, don’t waste your time saying it.” – Ryan Chute

Humor that doesn’t reinforce the principal point of your ad

Humor that doesn’t reinforce the principal point of your ad

Do you want to make some jokes and laugh with your audience? Okay, ask yourself this: does the humor force you to recall the central ad message or not? If yes, that’s great. That humor is completely welcome in advertising and will help people remember you.

However, if the humor is baseless and doesn’t help someone remember your central message, forget about it.

You can be as funny as you want, but if people don’t remember your ad, they won’t buy from you.

Saying things in the usual way

Nowadays, people see an insane amount of advertisements. It’s everywhere we look. It doesn’t matter if we’re in the airport bathroom. Or looking up in the air as a small plane with a banner passes by. We’re going to see advertisements.

At this point, that’s just another suppository of life.

Among all of those advertisements, which do you think will stand out to a passerby? Do you think the same old boring facts and tactics will keep working? No?

What about a unique advertisement that embodies a brand and captures attention with interesting words? In my heart you already chose this option.

Being interesting is the only way to stand out in this modern-day Sea of Sameness that is advertising. Keep this in mind, Pontiac.

Let us help you ensure your ads walk the ethical line perfectly— without going over. Contact Wizard of Ads™ today to speak with an ad expert. We’d love to help you get your advertisements seen and heard by the perfect audience.

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Ryan Chute
Ryan Chute

"My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, And they're like, it's better than yours, Damn right it's better than yours, I can teach you, but I have to charge." -Kelis Yeah. This is what I do for Home Service Companies.

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Frequently asked questions

Questions? We’ve got answers.

Who does the Wizard of Ads® for Contractors work with?

Wizard of Ads® for Contractors work with healthy and growing Residential Home Service Contractors hungry to grow by multiples, like you.

You are ready, willing, and able to grow your business. You are open to change and are seeking a distinctive angle of approach to gain the time and attention of a too-busy public.

You know that lasting relationships take time, patience, and good energy to nurture and cultivate. We carefully enter into every arrangement with the intention of working with you for as long as you own your business. You prefer lasting partnerships.

You are already a solid operator. You have successfully grown your business and appreciate the impact the right brand story will have to get to the next level in your operation. You know a strong relational message takes time to gain momentum, but it’s worth the one-time short-term discomfort for the long-term gains.

Marketing cannot fix a failing business.

We accelerate what’s already happening in a business. If your business is on the rocks, marketing will only speed up the inevitable.  

You’re focused on lasting change that leads to exponential, profitable growth, not just sales at any cost. Intuitively, you know that communication that enhances every element of your customer's experience and your employee's culture is the key to your success.

How does the Wizard of Ads® for Contractors charge?

Traditional marketing agencies are designed to capture the greatest amount of revenue from a client, regardless of results. Every last item is billed and expensed to the client. Typical agency fees can represent a whopping 55% of the entire advertising budget. That means a $5 million dollar advertising budget, you would spend $2.75 million on agency fees.

Think of Wizard of Ads® for Contractors as the Anti-Agency.

Our income is not tied to your advertising budget. Our income is exclusively tied to your growth. Our goal is to maximize your advertising impact with the lowest reasonable spend. This allows you to spend only what is necessary or to put extra horsepower into aggressively growing in your market.

The genius of this model is that it perfectly aligns our motivations as true partners for exponential profitable growth without the pain of being unaffordable. Ultimately, we are confident in taking the risk of being underpaid in the first few years because we know the results always speak for themselves.

Next, we do not accept commissions, referral fees, kickbacks, or other compensation from any service providers we recommend or engage for production work. Most agencies do. This includes the 15% agency commission for media buying. This approach is considerably different from the compensation plan employed by most advertising agencies, as it eliminates any potential conflicts of interest and allows us to focus our entire attention on helping you grow your business profitably as a true partner. For example, a $500,000 annual media buy would involve a $75,000 commission that we would have removed directly from your media providers' invoices.

This is the perfect pricing model for Residential Home Services.

By tying ourselves to gross revenue, we only have one motivation. Your motivation. We have no motivation to convince you to spend more money on marketing than what is necessary, and since we are a variable expense to sales, we NEVER become too expensive to have us on your team.

In almost every case, we end up lowering the amount of money you spend. We will stay within your planned marketing budget, including your media spend, production, and our Annual Fee. Add on the fact that you get any and all commissions back for media buys and various services provided by outside providers, and you will actually save money having us on your team.

Don’t forget, we have the largest buying power in North America for media buying, meaning for every dollar you spend buying media, we only spend 27 cents on average. This stretches your reach, impact, and frequency in a way no other agency (or yourself) can achieve on your own, saving you hundreds of thousands of dollars, eventually millions, every single year.

Clients who heed our advice and embrace our Marketing Strategy quickly add $1 million in incremental revenue to their business, making your investment a smart bet and a bit of a no-brainer.  

There is no longer any guesswork, hope, or fear that our marketing strategies are going to work. If our client’s are able to abandon any limiting beliefs about marketing, deliver operational excellence, and play the long game, our marketing strategy will accelerate their profitable growth.

Wizard of Ads® for Contractors pricing model is based solely on the topline revenue of your company. It consists of an Upfront Fee and an Annual Fee. These fees are inclusive of scheduled travel, services, and all other expenditures as outlined in the Consulting Agreement.

The Upfront Fee covers the intensive Uncovery Process, the first year’s Media Buy, the Creative Process, and the Market Research while the Annual Fee goes toward implementation, ongoing creative and consulting, and next year's media buy. You get a team of 3.5 people, with direct access to a top tier Creative Lead and Media Buyer, and on-demand access to me as your Master Strategist. You will also have a full-time Account Manager keeping everything on track.

While the upfront does have an initial pinch, it is easy to amortize the investment over the many years we will be working together to grow your business. Wizard of Ads® retain clients for 10 years, on average. The sale of the business is the number one reason for termination. We actively terminate the bottom 1% of clients who are unwilling or unable to follow our strategies.

Wizard of Ads® for Contractors believes that all rewards should be directly correlated to the success of our clients. This means that the Wizard of Ads® for Contractors only receives a raise when the company achieves growth. For example, if your gross sales for the year have increased by 25%, the Annual Fee you pay us in the following year will also be increased by 25%. Likewise, if your gross sales decrease, our Annual Fee will decrease by the same percentage during the following year.

This is an exceptionally easy and fair way to track and reward success. This model was developed by Wizard of Ads® over 35 years ago and has served us well because it serves our clients well.

As a rule of thumb, we take the risk of working for considerably less than our actual value in the first few years as we help accelerate growth. This means you need to be willing to pay us exceptionally well when you start doing even better.

When should I engage The Wizard of Ads® for Contractors?

There are four key revenue stages for engagement with the Wizard of Ads® for Contractors.

  1. Under $3.6 million in revenue
  2. Between $3.6 and $10 million in revenue
  3. Between $10 and $20 million in revenue
  4. Over $20 million in revenue

Under $3.6 million in revenue is an investment in your brand. This will serve you well in establishing your brand story early on and help you with your name, logo, and truck wrap design. It's easier to create pictures from a story than it is to make a story based on pre-drawn pictures. You'll be glad you did. Everyone on a fast path to growth is.

Most clients start with Wizard of Ads® for Contractors between $3.6 and $10 million in revenue. They have often seen a natural ceiling with their leads for demand service and are looking for ways to push past the ceiling. This can only be done with a properly executed brand strategy, specifically in mass media with a sticky story.

Between $10 and $20 million in revenue, Wizard of Ads® for Contractors has some natural economies of scale. This is a sweet spot where Wizard of Ads® for Contractors can offer some added value in getting the ball rolling.

Over $20 million in revenue is actually the lowest cost point of entry as a percentage of revenue, but not the cheapest time to start with the Wizard of Ads® for Contractors. Leveraging all economies of scale aside, we have been left out of the upside along the way, so engaging when over $20 million in revenue means we have to mend a lot of fences damaged along the way. This is also where clients see significant savings in their media buys and production costs.

There are also three market sizes to consider.

  • Primary Markets are the top 50 cities in America.
  • Secondary Markets are the smaller cities in America.
  • Tertiary Markets are the more rural trade areas in America.

When considering an engagement with The Wizard of Ads® for Contractors, consider what size market you are in. For example, a $3.6 million company in a Primary Market will struggle to get the necessary reach needed to make a splash. You either have to be more patient than a larger company or spend more money to accelerate your reach.

Alternatively, a $5 million company in a Secondary Market will look like a pretty darn big fish in a medium-sized pond.

A $20 Million company in a Primary Market will feel like a $50 million company using our strategies to potential customers.

The key to remember is that the earlier you start with the Wizard of Ads® for Contractors, the lower the investment to get started. As they say, the best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is today.

Are production costs included in your fees?

The Wizard of Ads® for Contractors Creative Lead will create the ad copy, cast the voice actors, source the production house, direct the performance, pick the music bed, manage all the edits, and provide you with the completed ad for final approval before sending to air on your behalf. This is included in our fees.

You pay for the production house, actors, royalty-free music, and jingles directly to avoid any potential for markups, commissions, or management fees.

We have many friends in the industry that give our clients good deals due to the large volume of work we provide them. We will introduce you to them.

How long before a brand-forward strategy starts working?

In approximately three months of activation, we’ll just be getting live on air. In six months (3 months on air), you’ll be getting anecdotal feedback from people that you are being heard, but there will be no direct line to revenue.

After 6 months on the air, you’ll think you made the biggest mistake of your life signing up for this branding nonsense. After 9 months on the air (12 months in) you’ll see the light at the end of the tunnel.

At 12 full months on the air, you’ll know why you did this branding thing. Two years from now, we'll be clinking champagne flutes as you wonder why you didn’t do this sooner.

How long before we’re live?

The general guideline is 70-120 days, depending on the level of production needed and if there is a name change to your business.

This includes an onsite visit, a deep dive into research, and getting things created, negotiated, approved, produced, and live on the air.

  • Uncovery - 15-30 days based on travel. 1-2 days onsite.
  • Research - 30-60 days based on the scope of work.
  • Creative and Media Buy Process - 45 to 60 days
  • Offline Production - 15 days for radio. 30 - 60 days for television.
  • Online Production (if switching) - 60 days

This means planning for roughly 90 to 120 days in the proper development and production of a completely unique Marketing Strategy before anything hits the airwaves.

Are you exclusive?

Creatively, yes. During the term of this Agreement, all Creative Partners assigned to your Account shall not engage, directly or indirectly, as an employee, officer, manager, partner, manager, consultant, agent, owner, or in any other capacity, in any competition of the client, including any company engaged in marketing consulting.

For clarity, the Creative Partner is defined as the individual Wizard of Ads® Partners who is responsible for creating your creative strategy and ongoing creative copy. Competition is defined as companies that engage in the same industry and business units (e.g., HVAC, Plumbing, etc.) as you. The market area is defined as the area where the marketing message naturally reaches through DMA or 60 miles from the city center of the client's service area(s).

Naturally, we exclude any potential future competition in markets where you are not currently active at the date of signing.

We do not limit Media Buyers in any market. Media Buyers get better deals for larger volumes, making it beneficial for the client to have the Media Buyer available to do as many buys as possible to secure the best deals on the client’s behalf.

Do you do digital marketing?

In rare circumstances, Wizard of Ads® for Contractors will provide specific digital marketing solutions. Wizard of Ads® has very specific Partners that provide digital services that serve Residential Home Services effectively. Under no circumstances will digital marketing services be offered without Wizard of Ads® for Contractors' core solution.

It is most likely that Wizard of Ads® for Contractors will work with your existing digital partners and suppliers. If you do not have a reliable digital provider, we would be happy to introduce you to a number of great providers that play nice with Wizards.

Do you do jingles?

Wizard of Ads® for Contractors can assist you in getting a jingle for your business. Like any other tactical element of a marketing strategy, we do not produce a jingle for the sake of a jingle.

If you do not have a story or a strategic reason to have a jingle...or an ad campaign to tie it to, do not waste your hard-earned money on a jingle. You are wasting your time and money.

When you do build a single unified marketing strategy that incorporates a jingle for a specific (often scientific) reason, we have a Jingle Wizard who has studied the art and science of jingle design.

He will score you an original, royalty-free jingle, including professional singers, musicians, and producers. He will not knock off a generic jingle from a publicly available music bed that sounds like everyone else's jingle.

Your jingle will serve a very specific reason and produce a very specific result. Have you guessed how much we love jingles yet?

Who owns the copyrights?

Wizard of Ads® for Contractors owns your copyright for two very specific reasons. We also provide a fair use clause in all contracts to ensure you are in no way limited to the access of your creative works, whether you are working with us or not.

The first reason we own your copyright is to ensure that we do not have to go up against our own creative works in other markets we serve. This means you are not allowed to lend, give, borrow, tweak, rent, lease, or sell your creative works to any other company at any time.

The second reason we own your copyright is that we can establish a one-time value for your creative works in the event that someone steals the content. Upon selling you the copyrights, you can go after the perpetrator for theft and make a considerable bounty in a slam dunk case.

Here is how Wizard of Ads® word the fair use of your copyright for as long as your business is in operation:

All writing and/or marketing materials we create for you are not works-for-hire. Wizard of Ads® for Contractors hereby irrevocably grants you, and your successors in interest, the non-exclusive, royalty-free, non-transferable, and worldwide right to use the Works in connection with the marketing of your business pursuant to the Marketing Strategy for so long as your business is operational.
How do I measure brand results?

There are a number of interesting ways to measure results. Some people like to get unique identifying telephone numbers, or create branded URLs that redirect to landing pages or the website. However, much of this is a waste of time and energy as it never tells the true story of the brand journey and how it affected the decision-making process.

Other indicators of brand effectiveness include tracking new customers, reactivated customers, or running a brand equity survey to get a sense of your share of mind. Digitally you will see direct search increase, which cannot be affected by anything digital, as well as branded keyword inquiries increase. You’ll, of course, need to get your digital people to add these to your campaigns if you hope to see an increase in conversions.

Wizard of Ads® for Contractors tracks the simplest of indicators. Top line revenue. When your branding takes effect, and the company responds in kind from the phone call or form fill-on, top-line revenue will increase. Efficacy is plotted on a T12, and total lead volume from all sources is tracked.

12 things you should know before signing up.
  1. Quality relationships take time. Branding is a long-term strategy. That’s why most contractors do it wrong, or not at all. There is always a lag between the start of the new campaign and the time it takes your customers to connect the dots. You MUST BE READY, WILLING, AND ABLE to endure this lag period. In our experience, the lag is typically 6 to 9 months, depending on how competitive the marketplace is, your company’s reputation, your budget in relation to reach, and the eight uncontrollable environmental factors. During this time, we will be helping you implement a transition plan to ease the pain. The good news is that this lag only happens once.
  2. Decisions by Committee. We completely reject the notion of decisions by committee. We work with a single, courageous decision-maker. We welcome decision influencers, but we only look to the Owner for the final decision. All decision-makers and influencers must be involved in the Uncovery and Marketing Strategy Presentation if they want to offer input in the future. It is critical that we have a 100% fully approved plan that can be defended and championed by all leaders in the organization.  
  3. Proven Strategy. That means we are not the low-cost provider. With nearly 200 home service clients and a book of strategic devices, tools, and tactics, this isn’t a guessing game for us. We know what to do to make your externally triggered grudge purchase appealing to your potential buyers. If you can deliver the goods, we can continue building relationships. If you are uncomfortable with the idea that you are paying us less now so that you can pay us considerably more once revenues allow, please do not commit. We intend to be your true partners, in sickness and in health...so long as you own your business.
  4. Automatic Payments. Everything is on automatic payments. If you struggle with managing cash flow, figure that out in your business first. We accept all major credit cards and ACH payments.
  5. We Cause Problems. If you don’t have a capacity issue now, I promise you will in about 9 months. Let’s deal with recruitment out of the gate as part of your comprehensive marketing strategy.
  6. We Own the Copyrights. All writing and/or marketing materials we create for you are not works-for-hire. We irrevocably grant you, and your successors in interest, the non-exclusive, royalty-free, non-transferable, and worldwide right to use the Works in connection with the marketing of your business pursuant to the Marketing Strategy for so long as your business is operational.
  7. Brand Building. We will be steering you to limit the use of discounts, rebates, coupons, and sales to attract clients. We know this feels counterintuitive to many, and we will clarify our reasoning. Rest assured, we have considerable experience in creating similar offers that are not damaging to your profitability, your brand’s integrity, and your preferable long-term client relations.
  8. Creative Authority. We must have creative authority over the words. You can accept copy as written or reject it outright, but you cannot modify the words yourself. If you do not like something as written, we are happy to discuss it and make the necessary change to maintain the integrity and intention of the words chosen. Alternatively, we will scrap the concept and create new copy that you are happy to get behind 100%.
  9. Proprietary Algorithm. The media buy must be structured in a very specific way, including running a full 52-week schedule. It is based on brain chemistry, not P&Ls. Once we have committed to the buy, it’s important to avoid adjustments unless they are calculated additions.
  10. Knucklehead Factor. You should expect knuckleheads. For example, when you start running ads that are certain to get attention, you need the courage to continue running those ads, even when you receive complaints. We celebrate complaints. It means we’ve made people feel.
  11. Digital Weasels. In about three months from the time your advertising campaign hits the airways, your digital marketers will show you a marked increase in direct and organic traffic. Some Digital Marketers will mistakenly claim this success as their own. Done properly, you can continue to spend less and less on digital lead generation by increasing your branded keyword online presence.
  12. Annual Marketing Meetings. Travel permitting, we prefer to hold Annual Marketing Meetings (AMMs) outside your city. Years of experience have taught us that we get better results when decision-makers are outside their sphere of influence, away from the day-to-day distractions of the office.

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